Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Prosecutor's Top Ten List

One of our regular contributors, a Texas prosecutor, recently took a trip up to New York City. In addition to dodging all the fast-walking yankees on the sidewalks and yellow cabs in the streets, he took in a taping of the Letterman Show. Filled with the Letterman spirit, he created his own Top Ten List and emailed it to me. Some of these come from his experiences when he was first starting out and some are more regular violations that he oberseves. Here they are:

Top 10 things for a defense attorney NOT to say to a prosecutor:

10) How long have you been licensed?

9) Who peed in your cheerios this morning?

8) Your case is circumstantial.

7) Is there any way we could get a different prosecutor for this case?

6) You’re in over your head.

5) I’ve seen you in trial and, quite frankly, you suck.

4) Who is your supervisor?

3) Did that suit come from Goodwill?

2) Relax. A dismissal is easy to sign.

and the #1 thing a defense attorney SHOULD NOT to say to a prosecutor...

1) No, I don’t want an offer. I want a letter of apology to my client…